19 October 2008
My mother is one of those }tell it like it is’ types and if you aren’t willing to listen, she’s willing to repeat it (many times, if necessary!) When she first suggested calling on Supernanny, it was more of a joke than anything.
It was about three years and two kids ago that the subject first popped up. “Hey Kadi, I saw a show last night and it was just what you need.” Her voice stifled a little chuckle. I rolled my eyes as she spoke of a woman named Jo, who traveled around helping clueless parents of bratty kids. “Thanks mom, but we can handle our own kids,” was all I replied. My mom’s disapproval of our parenting style has always been obvious and this new suggestion to get help while airing our dirty laundry was just the latest suggestion to improve our situation.
My due date was nearing. I had a house full of out of control kids and a head full of denial. Things were bound to get better after my sixth pregnancy was over, right? I thought that we would have time to work on our parenting after we got through this next baby and the sleepless nights let up. Little did I know there would be another pregnancy shortly following the sixth baby. Then we learned that my husband would need a major back surgery. The stress would only be compounded by the sale of our home and relocation to a far off area. Parenting would get shoved to the wayside in exchange for mere survival. If we all made it through the day alive, I considered it a good one.
After visiting the doctor in the summer of 2007, I was shocked to discover that my inability to open my jaw was in fact manifestation of my inability to handle the stress and anxiety of being the mother to a herd of rowdy and unruly children. I was prescribed an antidepressant and told to seek other forms of help to get my family life under control. But how was I to do that? I thought that moms were supposed to have everything under control. I thought that I should be able to correct my lack of proper parenting, rid myself of anxiety and put the pieces back together.
I tried fervently to mend my life by reading books on parenting, learning about ADHD, finding catharsis through writing. Those things helped, but we were at a point where all of my efforts would not be enough to get out children and our lives in order. The day that I decided to call the casting crew for Supernanny, was my admission to needing more help than I could find on my own. I called my mom and told her that I had made a call. She refused to believe me. “Aren’t kids supposed to obey their parents?” I joked when she sat silently on the other end of the phone. “I just don’t want you to be disappointed if they don’t call back,” she answered, sounding utterly shocked that I had actually gone to the extreme of calling.
Not even a day later, the phone rang with a call from the Supernanny casting team….