Autism and Ethan…
When her son Ethan reached 18 months and still wasn’t talking, Brenda Anderson, from St Augustine, FL, began to worry. She raised her concerns with her family pediatrician and advised to wait and see…
Words don’t come easy…
At my son’s 18-month well baby checkup, I mentioned to the pediatrician that I was concerned about the fact he wasn’t using any words at all. She told me we should wait until he was 2 and then take a serious look at the issue. She didn’t seem all that worried and I’d heard boys could be slower when it came to verbal skills so I assumed he’d just start talking. But over the next six months, Ethan still didn’t say anything so when he turned 2 I brought him back to the pediatrician.
Professional help
The pediatrician recommended that I contact the county’s Early Intervention Program (EIP) for an evaluation. I didn’t really know what to expect; in the event, they pretty much observed Ethan playing with toys and doing certain everyday tasks. The evaluation showed him with a significant delay in speech, so speech therapy sessions, along with ‘social skills therapy’ were set up twice a week. Autism was never brought up, by either the evaluation team or myself.
I’d thought Ethan’s behavior was odd at times, but I’d figured that maybe he’d just outgrow it
Mom’s instinct…
It wasn’t until I was on the phone talking with a close friend that autism entered my mind. My friend’s son had also been recently evaluated as autistic (Aspergers, to be exact) and she was telling me the ‘signs’ the professionals were looking for. As she was saying them, I was starting to feel really worried because that’s how Ethan was: delayed receptive and expressive speech, minimal eye contact with others, not interested in playing with other children or adults, craving routine and getting upset with sudden transitions, not playing with toys ‘appropriately’, lining things up and getting upset if the lines were disturbed, some sensory issues. I did my own online research and most everything about autism fit my son. I’d thought these behaviors were a bit odd, but I’d figured maybe he would outgrow them or this was his personality or he was just destined to be a ‘loner’ type of kid.
Making gains with therapy
Ethan showed significant gains in both areas of speech and in eye contact, playing for very short periods of time with another adult and using some toys appropriately. He was also doing well in a ‘class’ type therapy setting with three other children, learning to sit in his seat, take turns, listen to commands and ask for what he wanted. This therapy went on for about six months until we moved from Frederick, MD, to Florida.
Although Ethan did really well in preschool at first, he wasn’t able to cope with staff members he’d gotten used to leaving. It meant there tended to be a lack of structure in his school day
Losing momentum
Once we moved, we thought about the situation and concluded that maybe all Ethan really needed was a school setting, since he’d seemed to improve so dramatically with the therapy sessions. So when he turned 3 we enrolled him in a preschool/daycare facility. In the beginning it seemed a good decision: he’d come home happy and with new songs he’d learned. But then he started crying whenever we pulled into the parking lot and he wouldn’t let go of me. My husband felt he might not be getting enough attention in the class and in hindsight that might have contributed. The center had had high staff turnover in the five months since we’d enrolled Ethan, and he didn’t do well with change and no structure. Also, because he wasn’t potty-training very easily, he’d been held back in a class with younger kids, going over things he’d already learned. We both felt the school was no longer a good fit for him, so we pulled him out.
Seeking more help
Since we were having such problems with language and potty training, I contacted the EIP program in our area. Ethan was now at the stage where he was too old (EIP only goes up to age 3) but there were other programs for older children. We spent a lot of time just waiting for an appointment, and that was hard.
Being told Ethan had autism was a huge relief. I knew something wasn’t right with him and I’d already adjusted to that. Getting the diagnosis meant we could get him the help he needed
Finally: a diagnosis
Ethan was finally seen by the neuro-developmental pediatrician, who carried out a two hour evaluation. When we came back a month later for the results, we were told that based on the evaluation scores and feedback provided by us, our son had been diagnosed with an ‘Autism Spectrum Disorder with Significant Communicative Delay’. The doctor asked us, point blank, if that answer surprised or shocked us at all and I answered that it didn’t – in fact, it was a huge relief. I knew, as a mom, that something was not right with my child and the doctor confirmed it. But since I’d already been reading about autism, I’d already gone through my ‘adjustment period’ and was now just ready to take the diagnosis and use it to get Ethan the help he needed.
Moving on…
In addition to the diagnosis, we were given mounds of literature to digest; not so much about autism itself, but about all the special education laws and different organizations in our state that offered support and help. We were set up with an appointment with the public school system and after a few more weeks of waiting, Ethan, by now 4, entered into an Exceptional Student Education (ESE) Pre-Kindergarten class.
That has been the best place for him to develop in the areas of intellect, emotional maturity, and social skills. He’s assessed as being ‘high-functioning’ and he’s doing so well we’re going to try him in a mainstream kindergarten classroom this coming Fall.
Brenda’s younger son, Colby, will be evaluated for autism in June – both she and her husband are fairly sure he is also affected.